Donald Trump gets a king’s booking

Michael Arceneaux
3 min readAug 25

It may have been humiliating for the ex-president to take a mugshot, but he looked like a monarch en route to the Rice Street Jail.

Photo: Fulton County Sheriff’s Office

I’m surprised that Donald Trump didn’t smile more in his mugshot.

I assumed he would give some variation of mischievous grin when the moment came. If not as a big fuck you to all parties responsible for forcing him to come to the jailhouse, for the sake of looking his best for merchandising. Then again, Trump was heading to the Rice Street Jail of all places.

There is no reason to smile about that place unless you are rapping along to Latto’s “Fuck Rice Street” in the mirror.

Perhaps it is only right he opted to scowl in his debut as inmate No. P01135809.

He absolutely practiced that pose on the private plane flight to Fulton County, right?

Equally hilarious is that he claimed to be 6 ‘3 and weigh 215 pounds while describing his hair color as “strawberry or blond.”

I can’t stand this man, but he is so funny at times.

On his already infamous picture, Trump told Fox News Digital that Fulton County officials had “insisted on a mug shot and I agreed to do that,” which he noted was “not a comfortable feeling — especially when you’ve done nothing wrong.”

From my understanding, Trump’s booking took all of 20 minutes, but let him tell it, it was a horrible ordeal.

“Terrible experience. I came in, I was treated very nicely, but it is what it is,” Trump said in an interview with Newsmax following his booking. “I took a mugshot, which I’d never heard the words ‘mugshot’ — they didn’t teach me that at the Wharton School of Finance.”

His entire essence is mob boss cosplay yet here he is putting his pinky in the air to let you know he’s not some regular bitch after becoming the first president ever to have a bail bondsman.

Given how most criminal defendants are treated by comparison, though, I suppose he has a point.

I have always assumed that whenever Trump got indicted, the media would be unable to resist the temptation to treat his legal situation as this century’s O.J. Simpson trial.

Michael Arceneaux

New York Times bestselling author of “I Can’t Date Jesus” and “I Don’t Want To Die Poor.”